Thursday, 6 May 2010

Magic Smagic

Hubby and I were watching some random "Magician Shimshi" guy on Ellen tonight.  And do you want to know what we decided? 

We decided, quite simply, that we are avid supporters of outlawing magic.  Or, at least avid supporters of marginalizing magicians and people who like them.

We decided that magic is effing annoying. 

It's annoying for a lot of reasons, including, but not limited to:  1) magicians are dorks; 2) they just won't disappear for real; 3) MAGIC IS FAKE; 3b) you can't figure out how they do it; 3c) you never get to see it first hand; and, 3d) you can't trust a magician as far as you can throw his little white bunny. 

I hate to be a party pooper.  And I am all about having faith (believing in something that common sense tells you not to - thank you Miracle on 34th Street for that life lesson), but I just can't agree with magic. 

It's not even that I don't believe in it, per se.  It's just that I can't support it.  I can't support fakers (and doing "magic" but refusing to reveal your secret makes you a liar in my book - like when you were a kid and your friend would say "I can do a handstand" and you would say "so can I" and then she would say "so do one" and you'd be stuck with "I don't feel like it right now" - yep, FAKER). 

So I think magic should be - at the very least - marginalized.  I think Mr. "Mindfreak" (aka Criss I-don't-know-how-to-spell-my-name Angel) and all the other magicians, illusionists, tricksters, and fakers should take a hike.  (Sidebar:  it sounds like that includes politicians and lip-syncing pop stars, while we're at it.) 

Leave me alone, you idiots.  All you're doing is annoying me and pissing me off - and you're contributing pretty much nothing to society.  Yeah, that's right, I said it.  I resent your lies and I'm sick of it.  I'm going to start a movement.  Down with magic!  I don't care if you ARE a mindfreak - you bug me, and I'm not going to tolerate it ANYmore.  Farewell magic - see you in Hell.

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