Careful where you pee

At work today, before a meeting, I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth.

I started to put toothpaste on my toothbrush, and then behind me, in the mirror, I saw a colleague come out of one of the stalls. A male colleague.  In the women's washroom. 

I didn't even notice right away.  I said "Oh, hi! How are you?" and then it clicked. 

However, being the kind and compassionate person that I am, I decided not to point it out.

But then the conversation kept going.  How has my week been so far? Have I been on a business trip lately?  Am I going to this meeting too?  Are we late?

I kept chatting, sort of brushing my teeth in between sentences. 

Finally, he made a move for the door. 

And then he stopped.  Stopped dead.  Looked up.  Stared at me.  Stared at the door.  Stared back at me...

"Wait..."

"Yep."

Realization sinking in... slowly.  Surely his brain was taking its time to compute how this whole scenario was even possible.  This conversation should not be occurring in this particular place. The elevator, sure. The cafeteria, of course. But the washroom?  Huh.  Surely she's the one in the wrong bathroom.  But no, this is her floor. They must be co-ed bathrooms.  No, that doesn't make sense.  ...

It took him a while, but he did eventually come to grips with reality. 

"Oh my.  I'm so sorry."

"It's fine.  No harm done."

I just couldn't for the life of me figure out how he didn't notice when he walked in and there were no urinals, and he must have wondered what those little mailbox-type garbage cans in the stalls were for.

I didn't bring it up at the meeting.  I didn't want to embarrass the poor fucker. 

But I did proceed to tell everyone on my team afterward. 

And then I blogged about it. 

I'm no saint. 

Today was a highlight

Today was not an entirely bad day.  Things picked up around lunchtime.  Here's why:

I decided my cubical was lacking a serious amount of cake-related items.  There was not enough of a cake situation surrounding me.  I needed a circumstance in which cake was a prominent player. 

Luckily, I had the means and the wherewithal to rectify this sad misfortune. 

Off to the cafeteria. 

And then.  THEN the absolute bliss resulting from the purchase of a giant chocolate marshmallow s'more score bar cake square. 

Officially one of the best decisions I have ever made. 

I mean, it was surely at least 3,463 calories of pure sugar and lard, and it definitely sat in my stomach like a brick for a couple of hours afterward, but this was by far the most wonderful thing that has happened to me at work in at least 3 months.  Maybe even better than the boardroom wine and cheese party. 

The high that followed this massive caloric intake was entirely well-received and really quite exciting. 

From there, I was motivated to wish my friend and coworker a happy birthday by creating a sexy French character (Jean-Francois-Pierre-Luc) and then drawing his face on a balloon - complete with notes of admiration en français.   Unfortunately, Jean-Francois-Pierre-Luc's girlfriend (Miss Babette) was not pleased, and expressed her distaste via pink balloon a couple of hours later. 

This little rouse paid off, as I later received a slice of homemade chocolate banana bread as a thank you. 

The musical icing atop an already great cake day was the soft-rock radio station that played Faith by George Michael,to which I fully rocked out during my drive home. 

BOOYAW.